A Leader’s Need for Prayer
A Leader’s Need for Prayer
My Story
When I was six months pregnant with our second child, I had such a difficult pregnancy that my husband and I had to step out of our leadership roles at church and end hosting home group. We loved our community, but my pregnancy was so difficult that I wasn’t able to do anything extra. This led to feelings of depression and loneliness, but it also led to something I didn’t see coming.
I realized how much of my personal relationship with God was dependent on others- and only on others.
When I was teaching others the truth of who God was, I was teaching myself. When I was praying for others, I was connecting to my Father. And when I confessed my sin to others, I was … well confessing my sin. But what I realized in my hours and hours of alone time was that I didn’t naturally do that on my own—I had formed a habit of using the structure of leadership to keep me consistent in the key pillars of my relationship with God. The only thing I did alone was read my Bible and pray briefly in the morning. I didn’t realize how much more I was getting from others.
Hearing God Speak
This season was one of the more difficult seasons of my life—emotional, depressed, anxious, parenting a one-year-old and isolation. I needed help more now than ever and by God’s grace I could not get it from others. Yes BY GOD’s GRACE. In this season of isolation, I started to pray A LOT, listen to scripture (especially the psalms) CONTINUOUSLY and started texting people and asking for prayer like I never had before. Little did I know but it was finally quiet enough for me to hear the three persons of the Godhead speaking to me in a clear and intentional way. To be fair, I think they spoke to me for a long time but I wasn’t always willing or available to listen.
Now if it freaks you out that I just said God started to speak to me, let me say that I have been in your shoes and in fact I thought I was crazy at first. To clarify, I “heard” God in my heart, not audibly. But His voice was so comforting, and it eased my anxiety and depression like no person has ever been able to do. I started talking to God in a new way—a way that has since transformed my prayer life and to be honest my entire life.
Why Prayer Matters
So as a person who knows the bible, knows the disciplines and knows good community can I just challenge you that those things are all wonderful gifts from God, but in and of themselves are insufficient if you do not get to KNOW- truly know- the person who is speaking to you through those things. God wants a relationship with us and it is unlike any relationship that we can have with a person on earth. It changes us to the very core and daily renews us. When we get to heaven, God won’t ask us how many bible verses we memorized, bible studies we led or accountability partners we had.
“Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. On that day many will say to me, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and cast out demons in your name, and do many mighty works in your name?’ And then will I declare to them, ‘I never knew you; depart from me, you workers of lawlessness.’ (Matthew 7:21-23)
KNOWING GOD is beneficial now and the day we go to heaven. “I’m with Him” is our only saving grace that gets us through the door. Don’t get me wrong - I study my bible every day and I do believe it is the first place he speaks to us and nothing we “hear” from him or others will contradict it. I also believe we are each a part of the body and should work together to serve the kingdom of God. Community is vital. But now I know that those things are filthy rags if I do not know and serve the God who adopted me and called me into his family.
So what changed about my prayer life?
I like to keep things simple. Here are 3 easy steps that have transformed my prayer life.
I looked to my relationship with God as my only source of joy (because nothing else was working). I am not saying you can’t laugh with friends and enjoy and snuggle with your baby. I am saying that I was looking to other things BEFORE I looked to God.
Start listening. This one may make us reformed evangelicals a little uncomfortable but SEE ALL OF SCRIPTURE if you think I am making this one up. Over and over again we see God talk to Adam, Moses, the prophets, Jesus, the apostles, Paul and lots of “normal” people in between. And he still does! GOD TALKS. When I was at the end of myself I was willing to listen. Are you?
Pray continuously. We have also seen this command in scripture: 1 Thessalonians 5:17, Ephesians 6:18... Paul especially loves to tell us to do this. Prayer felt like a drag to me because I felt like I was talking to the wall. But once I found Jesus as a friend, God as a loving father who wanted to listen and the Holy Spirit as a true comforter and counselor—I COULDN’T STOP talking to him.
So…
Is your prayer life giving you life?
Do you feel you have a close and intimate relationship with each of the persons of the Godhead?
What is stopping you?
So how does this help me lead?
When we were able to re-engage in church leadership a bit, I noticed my ability to minister to others exploded. I believed I was praying before, but now my prayers change things. I’ve stopped relying on my own ability and instead of giving advice first, I pray first. And I’ve got stories… Prayer changes things, something my words or service could never do. Let this be an encouragement for you. Pray for yourself, pray for others and pray during your meetings.
Four reasons a leader should study prayer, pray more and pray big:
There is Power in Prayer. James 5:16 The Prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working.
God loves his children, so ask him what HE wants for those you lead. When I pray silently for a person before a meeting, time and time again I feel like the LORD leads me in a different direction than I was planning to go. He wants to use you. Stop getting in his way. Pray and let him!
God wants to show us something amazing, so keep praying until he does and then pray some more.
If you want to help someone, pray for them. If you want to change them, teach them to pray.